We Were Born To Be Real Not Perfect
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We Were Born To Be Real Not Perfect

Amanda Rafferty

Some people make the mistake that I have my life sorted because I am a coach and what was even worse was that I thought I had to keep up that pretence for the exact same reason.

In my own head I decided that if I showed that I have days when I am not feeling so positive or a little overwhelmed with the rollercoaster that is life, then other women would think I wouldn’t be the best choice for them or be able to help them move forward in a happier and more confident way.

Then I had a wee lightbulb moment a while back as I looked at other coaches on Instagram/Facebook – everything seemed so pretty, perfect and filtered, I just couldn’t relate.  How could I expect other women to relate to the real me, reach out or open up if I just show the unedited version?

So here it is, warts and all.  Yes, there most definitely are days when I feel overwhelmed and a little lost when it comes to the kids, family life and my business – do you know that feeling kinda clueless with what you are trying to achieve?  Does this contradict what I do in my line of work because I may not be full of the joys of spring all the time?  Does it mean that I am not a good coach?  To be honest with you I feel it makes me a bloody good coach because I am relatable.  How can I put up pictures/posts about how wonderfully perfect my life is when I have just had another argument with one of the kids or when I am tempted to book a one-way ticket to Barbados (oohhhh let’s all just imagine that for a mo)!  If it doesn’t reflect my own life how can I expect you to trust me and know I am genuine in wanting to help you.

I most certainly will not tell you that just because you start to change your thinking to more positive thoughts your life will suddenly become f**kin awesome.  Or, that all those insecurities you have will suddenly disappear and you will be able to look in a mirror and completely fall in love with the person looking back.  What I will do is be honest and tell you that it takes time – there will be tears and days that you feel bleugh – I will laugh with you, cry with you, support & encourage you to take that first step forward and make whatever changes are necessary to your personal/private life to help you feel more confident and less ‘stuck’.

You will learn to be kind to yourself, forgive yourself and allow yourself to go through the different emotions of being a wife, mother and more importantly woman without that feeling of failure.  I hold my hands up, I am still a work in progress but the difference is now I just focus on what is happening today, I can’t change yesterday but I can learn from it.  Will there be more crap days ahead?  Oh hell yeah, but I will get through them as you will when you take the pressure of perfection of those tiny little shoulders.

“Sometimes I may not have it altogether but my love & loyalty is always on point”

Be Kind To Yourself & Stay Inspired

Amanda R x

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